Sounds so odd to say that but I feel like I can. I have this sense of relief right now because of a simple and brief conversation with my daughter today. She finally called me and just the few details she gave me made me feel a bit of comfort that she is okay. Things are not perfect but she is alright and that puts my mind at ease. I have been trying to reach her because I wanted there to be some sort of open communication between us. I wanted to her to know we haven't shut her out of our lives and I hoped she hadn't shut us out of hers.
I asked her if she had groceries and she said she was being sent on her way to her new place with a box of Ramen from her boyfriend so I offered a gift card to a local grocery store. I must admit in my excitement to help (yeah, I said it...H.E.L.P.) and show her that I do care...I sent her a care package with a couple of old towels we had here, some shampoo she left behind, her hair brushes and then I went to the grocery store myself and got some toiletry items, some laundry soap and some girly "emergency supplies" so that she wouldn't have to spend her grocery money on that. For an extra treat I got a "Taco Bell" cheap gift card and a "Little Caesars Pizza" card. I know it's everything I said I wouldn't do but quite honestly, there is NOTHING that has made me feel better since she left than THIS. So if this is what it took, then I am okay with it. At least I know that for a couple of weeks she will have food and some of things she needs to get by. For me...I can breathe a little easier and perhaps turn my brain off for a while. I hope so.